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So I’m trying to learn Spanish. I figure that Spanish-speakers are eventually going to take over the country, so I may as well be able to talk to them when they do. I originally thought it would be super simple, since you can usually just add ‘o’ to the end of every English word and…
Hello, everyone! I’m typing this entire blog post with only one finger today, because my other nine have been heavily bandaged during a freak towel-folding accident I suffered last night. And it occurred to me that I have never yet discussed workplace safety.So here we go! As you know, workplaces are annoyingly safe. Very rarely…
Let’s face it – customers are annoying. They’re constantly asking for things, and they touch everything – and there’s no telling if they washed their hands the last time they went to the bathroom. Customers are gross. They should be illegal. But unfortunately they’re not illegal. There’s an election coming up, and I’m hoping to…
It is impossible to tell you how excited I am to be writing about today’s post. You see, every year I do one presentation that falls so far outside the norm that I don’t even truly know how to explain how I ended up doing that particular job. One year I performed in a loading…
Greetings from Pennsylvania! Today I am in the land of Hershey, a town which really does smell like chocolate. They gave me a Hershey bar when I checked in, and the lampposts in the town are capped with replica Hershey kisses. The cobblestone streets are made out of Reese’s Pieces, the grocery stores only sell…
Hello my loyal readers! Apologies for being absent for so long. If I were your long-distance boyfriend, you would have probably broken up with me by now. I’m sorry for being such a bad person. However, like all people who stop calling for too long, I have a good excuse. We have been working on…
Hello peoples! I am writing to you today from my living room. I’m wearing frayed slippers, plaid flannel pajama pants, the same T-shirt I was wearing yesterday (and which spent the night crumpled up on the floor beside my bed), and a plaid flannel shirt over top of that. Do my two plaids match? Not…
You know, I like to think of myself as a creative person. I don’t want to brag or anything, but I made quite the impressive collection of pinch pots when I was in elementary school; one of them was so incredible, in fact, that I should really refer to it as a pinch jug. So…
Hello, devoted readers! I’m writing today from Wichita, Kansas, which I learned yesterday is the airplane manufacturing capital of the world. You wouldn’t know it to look at the airport, since it would fit rather cozily into most suburban backyards, but Cessna, Lear, Airbus, and Boeing all have manufacturing facilities in the city. I learned…
Hello everyone! I’ve just come back from a meeting that literally made me want to rip my own ears off. If there had been a window in the subterranean dungeon we were sitting in, I would have flung myself through it and fallen peacefully into a row of thorny bushes (side note: why does anybody…