So here’s a new one. A recent Business Insider article introduced us to Jesse Herzog, an aspiring fashion designer who has bequeathed to the world the Suitsy, a one-piece business suit. You read that right. It’s a business suit, and it’s all one piece, like really fancy pajamas. You slip into the Suitsy exactly like you would slip into…wait for it…your one-piece pajamas, and then you zip it up in a single, fluid motion from pants to neck. (There are false buttons to hide the zipper on your shirt, in case you were wondering about that.)
This sounds like an amazing idea, doesn’t it? I mean seriously, having to put on two pieces of clothing to go to work? That’s so 1850s. In fact, I can’t see anything at all wrong with this revolutionary concept.
You will have to unzip yourself from neck to pants in order to go to the bathroom.
That’ll make for some fun times in the communal office restroom. I’m not exactly sure what I’d do if I ever walked into a bathroom and saw someone standing there with their shirt fully unbuttoned while they take care of business, but I believe it would involve me going to another restroom. On another floor. At another company.
You can’t remove the suit jacket.
Because it’s sewn to the shirt front. Which means that if everyone else decides to relax a bit and throw their suit jackets over the backs of their chairs, you’ll be the only one wearing a ‘jacket.’ And if anyone asks why, you’ll have no choice but to respond, “Because it’s sewn to my shirt. This isn’t actually a suit. These are pajamas.”
Did I just repeat myself? Oh, I guess I did. And I’m OK with that. They’re no getting around the fact that the Suitsy is a pair of pajamas. Very fancy pajamas, as I’ve already mentioned, but it can’t possibly look like a normal suit, anymore than jean leggings looks exactly like blue jeans if you get close to them.
Will the Suitsy do well? Absolutely. People are going to work wearing Spanx as pants, and legging as pants, and all manner of other things. But until now women have been the only sex reaping the benefits of this seismic shift in the world of business couture. We men have had shorts as our only recourse, and there’s no way to make shorts look professional. Finally, a way for us to be lazy and get away with it!
Buy stock in the Suitsy now, folks. You heard it first. They’re pajamas.
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